Real Talk.

J-Lo Gotta Chill.

Dear Jenny From The Block,

Boo,

You just filed for divorce yesterday and your already running the streets with a new boyfriend *sighs* give yourself some time to be alone. Seriously. Your on an emotional roller coaster right now and the last thing you want to do is marry another dancer. No shade to all the amazing dancers out there, but we’d like you to get to know yourself. I mean, you have kids lady! You can’t be bringing fresh meat around the babies, they need stability. They deserve it. Remember Chris Judd? We do. We’d like for that not to happen again. It’s backwards and your to old for that. Ma’am, your a strong 49 years old, Chill on twirking that thang for a few moments. Come on Jenny, did you see your last performance? The American Music Awards? It was terrible. Disgusting even … don’t remember?

Take a look boo …

We don’t even know what that first song was, but those dance moves? That Hair? That Leotard? That Fiat?

You Gotta Chill.

Take some time off. Take care of the babies and perfect your judging face on this upcoming season of ‘American Idol’. Your talents are tired. Sometimes you just have to reboot. Reboot your lovely lady lumps and your happy feet. Take it easy, Take control!

Although I know I just waisted 15 minutes out of my day it was worth a try. You’ll be married by Easter Sunday and huffin’ and puffin’ on the Season Finale of ‘Idol’ before I can say ‘On Da Floor’.

*sighs*

At least we tried.

Your’s Truly,

-SFPL

-Stay Fly!